January 2011
63 posts
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Hey, kids? Being gay is okay.
There was a disgusting article in our most disgusting national newspaper last week. It was written by a woman named Melanie Phillips who, for at least one day, became the one person I hated more than anyone else.
The paper she writes for is known for its “conservative”, homophobic, racist, sexist and generally ignorant views. It has become a running joke that whenever anything...
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I inhabit a culture where the word CUNT is the most offensive and most shocking word anyone can ever think of.
And the men are screaming that they suffer from sexism, too.
All I can think is symptom, never cure. Symptom, never cure.
Today has been a write off. (Accidental pun is accidental.)
Giving up. Going to go drink tea, watch The Fountain with my brother and generally while away hours until sleep.
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“We had all awakened X number of years past our youth feeling sleazy and harsh....”
– Douglas Coupland, Girlfriend in a Coma
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“Dreams have no negative. That is to say that if, during the day, you think about...”
– Douglas Coupland, Girlfriend in a Coma
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“Hamilton and I were the ones without goals. “Imagine you’re a...”
– Douglas Coupland, Girlfriend in a Coma
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hurryuppleaseitstime asked: Hell yeah it is, I've such a tumblr crush on you :)
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Tonight, I tried to write about the time I went to Prague with a friend I no longer see. About how, on our second day, wearing all the clothes we’d brought with us in the surprising cold, we walked by an inexplicably busy ice cream parlour.
I started it by saying it was the end of summer 2006, just after we left school with our A levels and prepared to say goodbye to each other and the rest...
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Malaise is a dirty word.
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I’ve been talking to my old English teacher about my RSC article and our classroom memories and he just told me that he can now choose to teach Harry Potter as a set text at A level (as in, to 17 and 18 year olds).
He chose Edgar Allan Poe instead, though.
This 'nakedness' is metaphorical.
I’ve been going through my old posts, which is a habit I tend to try & avoid but I have had some wine so I couldn’t really stop myself. I’ve found reams of stuff (lists, mostly) that I never published, just kept private because I couldn’t help but mention somebody’s name, or felt like it was all too narcissistic. And in amongst those were posts that, in hindsight,...
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I do not have enough wine.
Also, I ripped my pants.
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I have never been able to "let things go".
I try to, of course.
I imagine them as red balloons full of helium and imagine literally releasing hold at the top of a grass covered cliff top, but I can tell you one thing for sure: ten minutes later, I’ll be wondering whether I really let go, or congratulating myself for letting go so beautifully and how that thing that was once so painful probably won’t be, anymore.
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I am going through your archives tonight.
“Likes” of old, half-forgotten posts should be expected.
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“Life didn’t seem depressing or empty to us, but we could only discern that...”
– Girlfriend in a Coma, Douglas Coupland.
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“Question: would I do it the same way all over again? Absolutely — because...”
– Girlfriend in a Coma, Douglas Coupland.
My old place of work just took three months to realise their website had been substantially hacked.
(It actually wasn’t me. I just find these things interesting. Amusing. Of note.)
hello. →
bumblebird-hummingbee:
sometimes i start thinking about things that happen every day and i get so overwhelmed. like how the moon controls the tides. what a spectacular thought! gravity is so powerful that even at that distance, the moon pulls the water on the earth’s surface. its too much to think about.
“We’re creatures of circumstance, creatures of chemical influence, creatures of...”
– “Love” according to Jared.
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'Wavelengths' →
We asked him why and he said because it was all the man on the radio was talking about. But there was no man, no jazz. Only static. On every band, that snowy disquiet.
As if I needed another reason to recommend Jared.
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This Rabbit Died Running →
“We’ve travelled to the distant parts of this island with our steam contraptions in such a short space of time and we’ve noticed the time. Your sundials, you pagans, they don’t match up - we’d like to inform you of Greenwich Mean.”
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5:25pm
So far today, I’ve only had one cup of tea.
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“Why is it that I find it so difficult to accept the present moment, whole as an...”
– The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath (via ransombookquotes)
For our one and only Christmas together, she bought me a new hardback copy of my all time favourite book.
“You know, because you said yours was all battered and torn up?”
And while I feigned like it was the cutest and most thoughtful gift, I was rehashing that conversation, sure that I had slipped in an “I wouldn’t have it any other way” somewhere.
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These are the books I acquired today.
Chuck Palahniuk - Survivor Jean-Dominique Bauby - The Diving Bell & The Butterfly Xue Xinran - The Good Women of China Douglas Coupland - Girlfriend in a Coma Milan Kundera - The Unbearable Lightness of Being Siba Shakib - Samira & Samir
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Cat Stevens - Can’t Keep It In
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Dastards - Trouble
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Gin Blossoms - Until I Hear It From You
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The The - This is The Day
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Signs of the end
literarycollective:
One Crying on the stairs and promising it wouldn’t end well, four in the morning and becoming less drunk Two Sitting on the columns of the library in the dark with nothing to say Three Being rushed in so many places, uncomfortable yet pliable Four In a messy room, yelling about unclear crimes Five Refusing to enter my own room for fear of the company, carried away Six Crying...
whiteelephantintheroom asked: Happy 2011, Self Same! Just want to thank you for the recommendation + shout-out...it means tons. Looking forward to staying in Tumblr touch!
cheers not fears,
White Elephant in the Room
cheers not fears,
White Elephant in the Room
For now.
I’ve been in such a low, depressive state lately, I think it’s time for some positivity. So here are some things that have made me smile today:
Cormac McCarthy’s writing is too wonderful for words.
I got out of the house.
The peppermint mocha on the way home.
The guy on the train who was reading a battered old book and wearing a leather jacket like Jess Mariano.
I actually...
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“I’ll be post-feminist in the post-patriarchy”
– Meg Sullivan (via carlykitty)
I soaked in the bath for hours this afternoon, with my head submerged and staring at nothing in particular. Without meaning to, I lay that way, unthinking, until my skin puckered. I hate having my head underwater, but today it’s the only comfortable position I’ve been able to find.
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“There are worse things than being alone, but it often takes decades to realize...”
– Charles Bukowski (via pythons)
My mother is awake.
I’m considering joining her for her morning cup of tea before I attempt sleep.